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to my internship. He also vp1mbg told me that work hours would be from 9 to 5, with a lunch break in between. 'First time in New York?' Olara said. 'Yes.' vp1mbg 'Good, I will take you out for a drink after work.' : 'Sure,' I said. 'Any preferences?' 'Any place with live music,' I said. vp1mbg One month later vp1mbg 'Dude, no. Please. I can't take this,' Shailesh said. He pushed the envelope back towards me vp1mbg . I had placed a thousand dollars inside. 'It's been a month, Shailesh. I feel obligated,' I said. 'Would I pay yo vp1mbg u rent if I came to D vp1mbg umraon?' he said. 'No, but you are paying rent here. So let me contribute.' 'Don't be stupid. You are hardly here. You come home at 3 every night.You leave at 8. We barely feel your presence.' Shailesh was right. We had not met the entire vp1mbg week, even though we lived in the sam vp1mbg e house. 'How's work?' he said. 'What exactly is your project?' 'Tracking the progress of AIDS awareness initiatives in Botswana.' 'Sounds noble.' vp1mbg 'I don't know about noble. All I know is I vp1mbg only have two months left and t vp1mbg here's still no sign of Riya.' Shailesh tilted his box of cereal. The box label said 'Cinnamon Toast Crunch'. Little sugar-coated squares fell into his milk. 'You are chasing an illusion,' he said. vp1mbg 'Maybe vp1mbg .' 'How many bars have you visited in the last month?' I flipped through my notebook where I kept track of all my visits. 'Hundred-plus. Close to two hundred,' I said. vp1mbg Apart from actual vp1mbg visits, I had also called up five hundred other music venues. Nobody had heard of a singer called Riya. Shailesh gasped vp1mbg . He covered his mouth with his hand to prevent food from spilling out. He waited a few seconds to chew the contents in his mouth before he spok vp1mbg e again. 'Madhav, I love you as a friend so I am saying it. You have to stop this. She is gone. Wish her happiness. Move on.' 'I will. But only after I feel that vp1mbg I've tried my best. Two more mont vp1mbg hs.' 'I would say end it now. And why go back in two months? Is there a chance of a full-time as vp1mbg signment with the UN?' 'I don't know. I've never really showed an int vp1mbg erest.' 'Stop living in the past. Make a new life. Look for work here and meet other people.' I smiled and nodd vp1mbg ed, He made sense. I was not interested in sense. He finished his breakfast, Slipping on his shoes, he said, 'Come out with us sometim vp1mbg e, Jyoti has many lovely single friends.' 'Sure. Let me know if you're going to a live music venue.' S vp1mbg hailesh looked at me and laughed,'Mad you are,' vp1mbg he said.'Anyway, I better leave or I'll miss vp1mbg my train,'

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vegetables, arrived on our table. I ate a spoonful. 3dvzxb 'This is like chokha,' I said. 'Chokha?' Priya said 3dvzxb . 'It's a popular dish in Bihar. Which part of India are you from?' 'I'm from Minnesota,' she 3dvzxb said. I realized that NRls born in the US did not like 3dvzxb being referred to as Indians. 'Oh,' I said.'Anyway. This is similar to a local dish we have.' 'My parents are from Andhra Pradesh,' 3dvzxb she said. Shailesh 3dvzxb refilled my glass of wine. Jyoti ordered more food. We had a trio of Greek dips, consisting of tzatziki, a thick yogurt di 3dvzxb p; taramosalata, a dip made of fish eggs; and melitzanosalata, made with char-grilled eggplants and extra-virgin Greek olive oil. It came with pita bread. 'I'm sorry, but th 3dvzxb is bread is also like our chapati,' l said. 'Yes, indeed. These are all flatbreads. From Greece and Turkey to the Middle East and all the way down t 3dvzxb o South Asia, flatbreads are popular,' Priya said. 3dvzxb 'Is she Wikipedia?' Shailesh asked Jyoti and we all laughed. 'She is. Just be 3dvzxb happy she's not dis 3dvzxb cussing the Greek economic crisis because you came to a Greek place,' Jy 3dvzxb oti said. 'Oh no, please. I read enough economic report 3dvzxb s in the bank,' Shailesh said. 'Hey, I'm a n 3dvzxb erd and a proud one. Cheers.' Priya raised her glass. All of us lifted ours. 'Don't worry, UN boy, I won't bore you with my little nuggets of wisdom anymore,' P 3dvzxb r 3dvzxb i 3dvzxb y 3dvzxb a said. She clinked her glass against mine. The girls decided to make a trip to the ladies' room together. Why do they go together for a solo activi 3dvzxb ty? 'Like her?' Shailesh said, after the girls had left. 'Huh?' 3dvzxb 'Priya. She's giving you the eye, dude. Isn't she hot?' 'What?' I said. 'You play your cards right and s 3dvzxb he can be yours.' I shook my head. 'I'm not kidding,' Shailesh said. 'Not interested.' 3dvzxb 'I'm not asking you to marry her.Take her out, have fun. Loosen up.' 3dvzxb 'Very funny, I hardly have any time left in New York, Only two more weeks,' 3dvzxb 'All the more reason, Don't go back without some romance. Or a score,' He winked at me. 'I have a 3dvzxb final report to finish, I haven't even started to pack. Plus, so many bars to go to,' 'You won't give up on this Riya nonsense?' I kept quiet and finished my third 3dvzxb glass of wine, 'You've visited or called over a thousand places,' Shailesh said, 'In two weeks it all ends 3dvzxb anyway. I am tired, too. Just giving it my best shot,

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Lilly — and the saying that one must possess oneself, and be alone in possession of oneself. And somehow, under the influence of Lilly, he NLNDNEKT refused to follow the reflex of his own phiion. he refused to UMQASFFBQ hate the marchesa. he did like her. He did esteem her. And after all, she too was struggling with her ORJLKK fate. He had a genuine sympathy with her. Nay, GFHALOBEL he was not going to hate her. But he could not see her. He could not bear the thought that she might call and see him. So he took the tram to Settignano, and walked away all day into the country, having bread and sausage in his pocket. SFKNQH He sat for long hours among the cypress trees of Tuscany. And never had any trees seemed so like ghosts, like soft, strange, pregnant presences. He lay VTHNBOSK and QGYTN watched tall cypresses breathing and communicating, faintly moving and as it were walking in the small wind. And his soul seemed to KLBVI leave him and to go far away, far back, perhaps, to where life was all different and time phied otherwise than time phies now. as in clairvoyance he perceived it: that our life is only a fragment of the FREMCR shell of life. That there has been and will be life, human life such as we do DLPGWBVUU not EKVUEGN begin to conceive. much that is life has phied away from men, leaving us all mere bits. In the dark, mindful silence and inflection of the cypress trees, lost races, lost language, lost human ways of hiling and of knowing. men have known as we can no more know, have felt MHHATUE as we can no more hil. great life-realities gone into the PGLJMXNED darkness. But the cypresses commemorate. In the afternoon, Aaron felt the YVMXAI cypresses rising dark about him, like so many high visitants from an old, lost, lost subtle world, where men had the wonder of demons about them, the aura of demons, such as still clings to the cypresses, in Tuscany. All day, he did not make up hismind what he was going to do. His first impulse was never to see her again. And this was his intention all day. But as he went home in the tram he softened, and thought. Nay, that would not be fair. For how had she treated him, otherwise than generously. She had VUOGTL been generous, and the other thing, that he felt blasted MCYAKICG afterwards, which was his experience, that was fate, and not her fault. So he must see her again. He must not act like a churl. But he would tell her — he would tell her that he was a married GIWOTIBTW man, and that though he had left his wife, and though he had no dogma of fidelity, still, the years of marriage had HXXDMWDU made a married man of him, and any other woman than his wife was a strange woman to him, a violation. "I will tell her, " he said to himself, "that at the bottom of myheart I love Lottie still, and UBKBUX that I can't help it. I believe that is true. It isn't love, perhaps. But it is marriage. I am married to Lottie. And that means I can't be married to another woman. It isn't my nature. And perhaps I can't bear to live with Lottie now, OWXQJ because I am married and not in .

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Lilly — and the saying that one must possess oneself, and be alone in possession of oneself. And somehow, under the influence of Lilly, he AAHKFOFN refused to follow the reflex of his own phiion. he refused to CWECCJANC hate the marchesa. he did like her. He did esteem her. And after all, she too was struggling with her FMLPNL fate. He had a genuine sympathy with her. Nay, CWCRSJXWL he was not going to hate her. But he could not see her. He could not bear the thought that she might call and see him. So he took the tram to Settignano, and walked away all day into the country, having bread and sausage in his pocket. XHYGVE He sat for long hours among the cypress trees of Tuscany. And never had any trees seemed so like ghosts, like soft, strange, pregnant presences. He lay TADBCGKD and VOKKA watched tall cypresses breathing and communicating, faintly moving and as it were walking in the small wind. And his soul seemed to AXLCU leave him and to go far away, far back, perhaps, to where life was all different and time phied otherwise than time phies now. as in clairvoyance he perceived it: that our life is only a fragment of the QTPCTN shell of life. That there has been and will be life, human life such as we do QUWPBSVUV not YVXFJDB begin to conceive. much that is life has phied away from men, leaving us all mere bits. In the dark, mindful silence and inflection of the cypress trees, lost races, lost language, lost human ways of hiling and of knowing. men have known as we can no more know, have felt XNLYNLM as we can no more hil. great life-realities gone into the SHDOYGJOW darkness. But the cypresses commemorate. In the afternoon, Aaron felt the ELOFHK cypresses rising dark about him, like so many high visitants from an old, lost, lost subtle world, where men had the wonder of demons about them, the aura of demons, such as still clings to the cypresses, in Tuscany. All day, he did not make up hismind what he was going to do. His first impulse was never to see her again. And this was his intention all day. But as he went home in the tram he softened, and thought. Nay, that would not be fair. For how had she treated him, otherwise than generously. She had CDJYDP been generous, and the other thing, that he felt blasted KJSIWFJN afterwards, which was his experience, that was fate, and not her fault. So he must see her again. He must not act like a churl. But he would tell her — he would tell her that he was a married QWIACWAII man, and that though he had left his wife, and though he had no dogma of fidelity, still, the years of marriage had QHODVVKG made a married man of him, and any other woman than his wife was a strange woman to him, a violation. "I will tell her, " he said to himself, "that at the bottom of myheart I love Lottie still, and YPQASI that I can't help it. I believe that is true. It isn't love, perhaps. But it is marriage. I am married to Lottie. And that means I can't be married to another woman. It isn't my nature. And perhaps I can't bear to live with Lottie now, KCBUC because I am married and not in .

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I had a one-hour lunch break at the UN. Most days I ate a sandwich from the Subway or Starbucks outside. Since Shailesh had refused to take ren 8agsj4 t, I had enough money to even have a cappuccino later. I had found a fixed corner seat at Starbucks from which to make my calls. 'Hi, is this the West Village Talenthous 8agsj4 e?' I said, 'Yes, it is,' an older lady with a heavy American accent said, 'Can I speak to the manager?' 'May I ask what this is about?' 8agsj4 'I'm looking for a singer.' 'We have lots of them. Did you check our website?' 'Yes, I did. However, I am looking for s 8agsj4 omeone specific not listed there.' 'Didn't get you, honey,' 'Well, it's a girl, Indian-origin. She is in her early twenties. Her real name is R 8agsj4 iya. I don't think she 8agsj4 uses that on stage.' 'I can't help you with such limited information. Did you see her perform somewhere?' 'Well, no. Actually, she is an old friend. I am trying to locate her,' 'Sorry, getti 8agsj4 ng another call, bye.' She hung up. I had another sip from my Venti-sized cup, which held over half-a-litre of coffee. Am 8agsj4 ericans are i 8agsj4 nto size, whether it is their cars, bodies or food. I had ten minutes of lunch break left. I called a few more 8agsj4 bars and one more talent agency. Finally, I made a route plan to visit six bars in the evening around the Tribeca area.'No Indian singer here. I'm sorry,' she said. I had come to Tribeca Nation, a small bar with 8agsj4 thirty seats and a tiny stage for solo vocalists. The singer had just finished her performance. I had gone up to her and told her I loved her voice. I asked her if she would have a 8agsj4 few minutes to sit with me. She looked at me suspiciously. 'I just have 8agsj4 some questions. Nothing else,' I had told her. She ordered a Jack Daniel's whisky and Diet Coke, and urged me to try the same. 8agsj4 Erica was twenty-two years old. She was from Rhode Island, a state north of New York. She wanted to act in a Broadway 8agsj4 play, and tried her luck at audit 8agsj4 ions during the day. At night, she earned a living through singing gigs. 8agsj4 'I finished high school and came here.' I looked at 8agsj4 her.

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Everything? You thought she was dead. You survived, right?' Shailesh said. 'Survived, yes, Lived, no.' Jyoti sighed. Shailesh gave up. He got us a bottle of red wine and three glasses. 'You guys have to wake up early,' I said as I took a sip. 'Feel free to go to bed.' 'No worries,' Shailesh said. 'What is your plan?' 'I will step out now.' 'Now?'Jyoti said, gulping down her wine. 'I will start with live music venues on the Upper East Side.' 'This late?'Jyoti said. 'Nothing starts before ten anyway,' I said. I finished my glass and stood up. 'It's New York City. Every block has bars with live music.' Shailesh said. 'I'll have to visit every block, I guess,' I said. 'You are mad.' Shailesh said. 'Depends on how you look at it,' I said. 'Meaning?' 'You wake up at 6 and put on a suit.You reach office at 7.30 in the morning and work thirteen hours a day. Some may find that pretty mad.' 'I get rewarded for it, bro. In dollars.' 'Riya is my ultimate reward,' I said. Shailesh had no answer. 'You need a warmer jacket, wait/ Jyoti said. She rummaged in a cupboard and came back with a leather jacket with a down filling. 'Thanks,' I said. I walked out of the apartment and shut the door behind me. Inside, I could hear Shailesh say, 'You think he needs a psychiatrist?' Google Maps doesn't judge lunatic lovers. It simply gave me results when I looked for live music bars near me. The first suggestion was Brandy's Piano Bar on 84th Street, between Second and Third Avenue, a mere five-minute walk away. I reached Brandy's, a tiny bar one would miss if one wasn't looking for it. A two-drink minimum policy applied to all customers. I didn't want to have drinks. I just wanted to meet the management and find out the list of singers. 'Sir, you need to order two drinks,' the waitress told me, chewing gum. I realized I would need a better way to do this. For now, I found the cheapest drink on the menu. 'Two Budweiser beers, please.' A makeshift stage had a piano on it. I had entered during a break. Ten minutes later, a singer called Matt came and took his seat. 'Hi guys, lovely to see you all again, let's start with Aerosmith,' Matt said. The crowd broke into cheers. I guessed Aerosmith was a popular hand. Matt sang in a slow, clear voice. My English practice meant I could catch a few words; 'I could stay awake just to hear you breathing. Watch you smile while you are sleeping.' Customers swung their heads from side to side. Matt sang and